Posts Tagged ‘Drugz’

Ball-Tripping [or] “Drugs That I Have Tried: An Unchronological Series (Part the First)”

Monday, August 17th, 2009
The Dopamine-st New Club Drug

Varenicline

This shit will seriously fuck your shit up, bro-bro, ’specially if you chase it with copious amounts of booze ‘n’ Ralphie dander. Shit, I woke up facedown-naked under the living room coffee table, having completed my mission of smoking my last fag and purposefully walking headfirst into every wall of my flat. Side effects may include adopting British slang like some twattish Oberlin sophomore. J/K, bro-bro! Side effects actually include (no shit, this is from the literature): nausea, unusually vivid and strange dreams, constipation, gas, vomiting, depressive behavior, suicidal ideation, suicidal behavior, hallucination, paranoia, and fear. Those nutty Krauts at Pfizer know how to craft one fucking awesome party pill, people. Get on this tip now before it peaks and home-labs start popping up Downriver. I’ve got a pretty solid hook-up on this one, so hit me up at poker after I hit you up for twenty bucks. Pax exeunt.